Facade
by Morgana Maeve
Summary: [Axel.Roxas][One.Shot][Strongly implied Yaoi] Nonexistent emotions from phantom hearts are never enough.


Façade

Morgana Maeve

Yeah, I'm just popping out the one-shots like a Pez dispenser pops out Pezes. Oh, jeez that was lame, I'm so sorry.

Looking back at the other one-shots, I've noticed that I've been real snippy in the author's notes, and I'd really like to say that I'm not a naturally snippy person. I have no clue as to why I came out so mean in them, and just know that I'm more of a goofball than my writing lets on.

Disclaimer – I don't own Kingdom Hearts; it belongs to Tetsuya Nomura. One day, I will buy the Axel and Roxas action figures, though, and make them do obscene things to each other. And I will take pictures, too.

oOo

_Nobodies can't feel, but they don't want to admit it. Nobodies can't bleed, but their empty husks leak dust. Nobodies can't truly exist, but their personalities differ just as people with hearts do. _

The list of cannot winds down forever, and Axel is tired of it. He likes to think the emptiness inside of him is an unnamable emotion. He believes in it so much that one day, this delusion replaces reality.

_Nobodies have no emotions, but they can speak words of anger and sarcasm. Nobodies have no hearts, but they name themselves after their lost existence. Nobodies have no souls, but they strive for the unattainable._

The sea of have not is unfathomable, and Roxas slowly drowns in it. His memories slip thought the hairline cracks in his shell, and one day, all that is left is a name, and he knows not a face to place it against.

Cannot and have not are not supposed to meet, but in The World That Never Was, reality takes deviances.

One day, following the forever-coiling list of cannot, Axel finds himself at the bottomless sea of have not, and pulls the drowning Roxas from its cold and cruel waters. Roxas clings to his savior, and something is born that day, though neither one knows. The expanse of emptiness in Axel moves back in a miniscule amount, and the sheets of cold in Roxas melt just a bit.

_Nobodies cannot love, but they pretend to be friends and enemies with each other._ Even in their emotionally starved nonexistence, they realize this façade, and the phantom beating in their chests become all the more painful.

Treading in the deep sea of have not, Roxas finds the evermore-twisting list of cannot, and uses it to pull himself out of the black waters. He follows it until he meets Axel, who stands at its beginning, wondering if nonexistence can be terminated. They stand next to each other, and emptiness fills and cold heats.

_Nobodies have no pain, but they cry out when struck anyway._

Axel controls fire, and one day, his fire evaporates the sea of have not.

Roxas does not control anything yet, and one day, he rips apart the list of cannot.

_Nobodies cannot die, but they fade from shadows into darkness._

Roxas tries not to think of his lost memories, but when they drive away his sanity, Axel is there to bring it back to that empty echo of a body. And when the emptiness threatens to swamp Axel, Roxas is there to banish it to that dark place residing deep within Axel's chest where his false heart fictitiously beats a tired rhythm.

_Nobodies do not feel pleasure, but they hold to ghost memories of it._

When Axel is inside of him, Roxas's cold turns to phantasmal warmth, and he willingly seeps deeper into it. When Roxas's cold envelopes him, Axel's emptiness fills, and he tries to plumb it for all it's worth.

They both come silently, and they feel nothing.

Then, one day it all falls apart. Without the unfathomable sea of have not or the forever-coiling list of cannot, Roxas and Axel truly believe they can feel. And when Roxas leaves to find his lost memories, Axel stays in the rain, his phantom heart falsely broken.

Roxas's fate is sealed when he meets Sora, and Axel finds that nonexistence can be terminated when he tries to free Roxas from Sora's warm, feeling body.

But Kingdom Hearts can be kind as well as cruel, and when Sora's life finally extinguishes, his shared heart journeys back home.

_Nobodies cannot feel because they have no emotions, but people with hearts and souls can and have._

They meet on a sidewalk, walking opposite paths. As they pass each other by, their shadows embrace for one fleeting moment, and then all that is left are phantom echoes. But they look back, and slowly but inexorably they find themselves drawn into each other's arms once again.

This time, when they both come, they come in a twisting sea of sound and feeling, and two real hearts pound in an ever-increasing tempo, accompanied by a chorus of singing blood.

oOo

Ha, ha, buttsecks! I'll have you know, that was the hardest part of this to write. I think my face went twenty different shades of red, and I probably had a mini-stroke while I was typing it. I'm hopeless, aren't I? I mean, I can look at Yaoi, read Yaoi, but I can't write one sentence that implies it. What's wrong with me, Doctor?

I have to stop writing one-shots; "Unfulfilled Prophecy" needs to be updated, and my other stories are withering from disuse. Eh, screw it! Daily one-shots are good for the soul! (Somewhere, Spongebob is crying at the fact that his quote has been mangled and that it has been mangled in a Yaoi fanfic no less.) The string of one-shots shall continue!

Feedback is welcome, but the Asinine Comments Filter is set to sing "Gay Boyfriend" forever and ever if you decide to be a jerk-face!


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